I’ve been on my own now for nearly a week. My family have packed up and gone on their holidays and on Saturday I’ll be doing the same. Life is manic, work is manic. There are a trillion things to be done and only a handful of moments to do them in. I’m no mathematician, but even I know that the odds are against me on that one.
The politic of self is too prevalent in our world. We’re led to believe that true happiness lies in understanding what we want and going hell for leather after that dream. People put off having a family later and later. Those of us that shift our butts in and out of the corporate world on a daily basis are seen as slaves to a cause. A cause that is not, has never been and will never be ours. We are the dupes, the losers, the muppets.
Spending so much time on my own makes me sad. It makes me a little depressed. It is hard coming home to an empty house after a day at work. Not necessarily because I want to talk about work, not necessarily because I want to hear about other people’s days. But because there is no reminder of the reasons for which I do what I do. A long, long time ago I sat in a bar drinking very cheap brandy. I was a psychology student and with me was my best friend and fellow student. As we drank we talked. We talked about whether it was possible to truly carry out a selfless act. We ended up determining it wasn’t. The brandy based theory being that every act was ultimately driven by the desire to do the right thing and to be seen to be doing the right thing. Therefore, this was not selfless, it was essentially selfish.
I’m not sure whether that was right or wrong. I’m no great philosopher and I don’t have enough alcohol to hand to recreate the experiment. What I do know, though, is that if you believe that you are the most important person, if there is no other in your life then you are poorer. Whether it is your kids, your parents, your siblings, your partner or your pet. Being for others is an important part of the human psyche. Being for yourself is not part of the genetic make up of the human.
I could be watching sport on a 24 hour loop right now, I could be indulging in films, listening to music, I could stay up all night and party. Ok, that last one is an exaggeration, I could maybe make midnight with a lot of Pro Plus and Red Bull. But all I really want to do is see my kids, see my partner and help. Cook for them, care for them, be there for them.
Everyone needs someone more important than them. If you don’t agree…..you’re the dupe my friend……not me.