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Doing cartwheels

11/18/2010

[tweetmeme]

HRD: Bonjour……

CEO: Ahhh…..its you….well come in…….

HRD: Thanks……..but……..ummm……. I am……

CEO: You are what?

HRD: ………………………….in

CEO: Ahh…..yes…….indeed……….remind me why I wanted to see you?

HRD: You just said you wanted to see me……

CEO: Well that’s no good is it? I mean…am I expected to know everything around here? For fucks sake…..fucking useles……

HRD: …….you wanted to give me a pay rise……?

CEO: No. It definitely wasn’t that……

HRD: …….a promotion?

CEO: To what?

HRD: *under breath* anything above Chief Dogsbody would be an improvement……

CEO: What?

HRD: I said……umm……has there been any movement?

CEO: In what?

HRD: ……stuff?

CEO: You’re making absolutely no sense today. Have you been drinking?

HRD: ….if only……….

CEO: Anyway, why are you here?

HRD: Is that a philosophical question?

CEO: Stop wasting my time.

HRD: ………………………………………….

CEO: …………………………………………..

HRD: so……………………………………….

CEO: ………………………………………..so?

HRD: …………………………..wanna hug?

CEO: GET OUT!!

10 Comments leave one →
  1. david permalink
    11/18/2010 09:48

    See what happens when you detract from accepted corporate language. Bonjour indeed!

  2. 11/18/2010 10:08

    I like that a lot

  3. 11/18/2010 10:14

    I recall having a date with a very similar script, many years ago. Except the promotion bit. I think I asked for something else.

    • Corporate Daycare permalink
      11/18/2010 14:07

      Ha! I just spat my coffee out reading this.

  4. Corporate Daycare permalink
    11/18/2010 14:06

    What does it say about me when I say that the above conversation made complete sense to me.

  5. 11/18/2010 16:57

    Haven’t you got more important things to do? Blogging FFS…….

  6. 11/18/2010 23:58

    @Corporate Daycare: are you the CEO? 🙂

    I thought for a minute you’d happened on the script from next week’s Apprentice! CEO has to be a he! A woman would be more organised and have 100 reasons why she needs to see you. There’d be a list of all the tasks you’d done wrong over the last ten years! 😉

  7. 11/19/2010 13:31

    Ha!
    Love it.

    Welcome back, CEO.

  8. 11/22/2010 03:23

    A new day coming right up – try again. Maybe he didn’t like your tie?

  9. 11/24/2010 10:15

    @david – Never trying that again……Italian maybe?

    @paul – Thanks! 🙂

    @James Mayes – Perv!

    @Corporate Daycare – I feel your pain!

    @petergold99 – I consider it my outlet……! 🙂

    @VernoicaPullen – Thanks for commenting! Now that would be telling! 🙂

    @Henry – I thought it was time they had a dust off……

    @mkeefer – next time the tie goes around the neck…..and I’m not talking about mine!

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