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The last laugh

01/17/2011

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Today is officially Blue Monday….the most depressing day of the year, where more people seek counselling than others.  You have no money, you’ve failed on all your new year resolutions (which were a crock of shit anyway), you’re fatter than you want to be, your boss is an arse, it is pissing down and in my case you have a hangover that if it were an earthquake would be off the Richter scale…..

The answer my friends? Stick two fingers up and tell Blue Monday to jog on. Laugh in the face of adversity, stand up (those that are capable) and be counted…..be a man……or woman/boy/girls or transgender like person who gets stared at on the train…..

With this in mind, I give you the best work place related joke ever….

An employee with a terrible history for taking time off phoned in again on a Monday morning, “I’m sorry, but I’ll not be able to come in today…….I’m too sick.”

On hearing this his exasperated boss could barely conceal his anger and retorted in a rage, “just how sick are you?”

“Well” the employee sighed, “I’m in bed with my sister!”

I bet you’re smiling now…….

7 Comments leave one →
  1. 01/17/2011 09:22

    I’ve decided to marry a pencil. – I can’t wait to introduce my parents to my bride 2B.

    I have a recurring dream where I divide 10 by 3.

    I was just looking at my house on Google Streetview and I saw my wife
    through the window in the front room, shagging the milkman.

    It was only after I’d bludgeoned her to death that I realised that the image was two years old – when I used to be a milkman.

    My girlfriend wasn’t impressed with my new memory foam mattress.

    I think it was the imprints of a me, a 17 year old girl and a donkey that made her mind up.

  2. garethmjones permalink
    01/17/2011 09:29

    funny how the most ‘upbeat day of the year’ is never publicised isnt it?! Don’t mention happiness!!! Its not newsworthy!!!!

  3. 01/17/2011 09:53

    Thought it was next Monday 24th???

  4. Corporate Daycare permalink
    01/17/2011 13:47

    Thank you.
    I now have to spend Blue Monday cleaning coffee off my keyboard.

    People – don’t drink (coffee) while reading lame jokes.

  5. Ralph Bassfeld permalink
    01/17/2011 20:46

    Seeing I found out today my job is being “reorganised” in 2 months, I’ve decided to take it easy and just laugh at your joke 🙂

  6. 01/18/2011 09:00

    @Stephen O’Donnell – Those were described as Dad jokes I believe! 🙂

    @garethmjones – Well we do love to moan….apart from me of course……

    @citizenr – Maybe there are two!?!

    @James Mayes – Absolutely….I’m not having a February this year….in a kind of a leap month thing.

    @Corporate Daycare – I’ll email you some tissues.

    @Ralph Bassfield – I’m really sorry to hear that. If I can do anything will you let me know?

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